THERE'S AN INTERESTING debate going on over at thegayte-keeper, one of my favourite blogs.
TheGayte-Keeper himself, usually a sensitive soul, had the following conversation with a young 'un:
Him: I have not every been f&ck before, but I have sucked my bro lol TG-K: yr bro? Him: Yeah he is a year older but we did it when we were 17 and 18 TG-K: but he is yr brother? Him: yeah, we were just wrestling, and he started it so what it felt good. TG-K: ok TG-K: so is yr brother gay? Him: No he is married now. Im the one who is TG-K: uh-huh TG-K: I am sure he is TG-K: so u guys never talked ahimut wot took place? Him: I’ve never discussed it with another soul TG-K: o TG-K: k Him: u think it was wrong to experiment with my bro? TG-K: DUH! TG-K: he is yr flesh and blood TG-K: if it wasn't wrong u would have told others about it Him: I disagree cuz all we did was experiment. just played. and no seed was taking inside of either of us. besides who u closer too than a brother. TG-K: so why haven't u told anyone about it? TG-K: if u feel it isn't wrong Him: cus I’m not sure being gay isn’t wrong. TG-K: but u were adults (almost) TG-K: that has nothing 2 do with being gay right now TG-K: this is about you and your bro messing around Him: u saying it is right to be jacked off by a stranger but not every a brother. TG-K: yes I am Him: o k why? I’m interested. TG-K: dude if u don't know then I can't tell u TG-K: sorry Him: so am I doomed because of one mistake. TG-K: I am not saying that TG-K: just that if u can't acknowledge that it was wrong then something is wrong TG-K: right?There's a few issues at play that I'd like to address. Firstly, the issue of sex, or sexual experimentation, between brothers (or other male family members). As regular readers of ka-os|theory will know, I have a thing for twins. It's an extremely erotic fantasy. But I also know that whilst others share my fetish, many people find it incomprehensible and at worst disturbing and obscene. Whatever your personal feelings on the subject are, it's extremely common. It happens. Trust me, I know. Boys will be boys. The second issue here is one of trust. Here we have a young, gay boy - not man, boy - confessing to a more mature peer a deeply personal, emotionally complex situation. Instead of guiding the young 'un, our correspondent tears a strip off. Now, I like thegayte-keeper a lot, he just made a bad judgement call and let his personal beliefs get in the way of his responsibilities - those responsibilities being to nurture, guide and take care of our own. Young boys are everywhere: those juicy-booty, tight waist, fresh-faced 18-year-olds on BGCLive. Some of them are pure, unashamed sluts, wholly concerned with busting a nut at every and any opportunity. Some of them really are kids, blindly trying to find their way in The Life, not knowing what to say, how to be, what to do. You remember, you were once. Maybe you still are. But all of those young gay boys need our help. They rarely get it from their families, or their existing friends. It's up to Us to be their big brothers, their father figures. You were him, once.
9 comments:
Apparently it happens more frequently than I thought...It should be addressed openly.
Complicated subject matter all over.... I shall not divulge my secrets....
we should reach out to peeps as much as possible
Dusty Boot,
You probably should divulge your secret, that would help like LongOverdo said and let it be discussed openly. (lol but maybe I'm just want to hear what the secret is.)
Yes Dusty, tell us. We're all friends here.
I am sorry that you feel that I was wrong for saying something is wrong...so we live a world where we can't voice our opinions for one reason or another? I didn't shun the boy I chatted with him and I think that you are wrong for feeling that I am wrong because I didn't what you felt I should...
The discussion on G-K's blog so highlights the beauty of the WWW - Sir Timothy Berners-Lee should be immensely proud. I love the idea of people sharing their views and reactions. What did we do before the WWW? Sir Timothy really deserves a Noble Peace Prize.
Unless someone has been socialized completely differently, by a certain age of cognizant reasoning, we KNOW instinctively what's right and what's wrong. If someone were to ask my opinion, I don't see it as a judgment call to state my personal belief, whether it hurts someone, enlightens them, or confirms what they themselves already know. When we know better, we tend to DO better.
The duty of any true friend is not to be a yes-man or yes-women to the other. It's to be an honest person who speaks the truth to them. It doesn't necessarily have to come from a place of judgment. Sometimes it's just straight-up common sense.
One.
I dont see how he was 'judgmental'.
he ends with: 'just that if u can't acknowledge that it was
wrong then something is wrong'
Obviously it would only boil down to a discuss about morality, what is moral, what is not, why? and then there would be several schools of thought.
Perhaps he felt this case was core and basic to our instincts.
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