Next 2 you


Chris Brown - Next 2 You (2011)
From the album F.A.M.E.

Some time ago, Brian McKnight made a video for his big weepy ballad Back At One, in which he used the imagery of a plane crash to sell his records.

Aside from being tasteless and ill-advised, it typified the kind of pseudo-cinematic crap music videos were rapidly starting to emulate. Fast-forward ten years, and your average Hollywood blockbuster is a joyless two hour music video/video game, and music videos themselves look like Chris Brown/Justin Bieber's Next 2 You.

My boo acquired an MP3 of Next 2 You many months ago, and upon hearing it, I begged it off him, eager to listen to it at 3am, half-cut on wine-in-a-box. But even I - operating under a thick scab of cynicism - couldn't have predicted the video that the focus group/accountants/PR people managed to come up with for this pretty decent slice of R&B pop.

Look, I like Bieber's Baby as much as the next wine-in-a-box wreck, and Chris Brown is occasionally brilliant, as anyone familiar with his leaked bootlegs will attest, but this video is f*#king ridiculous. Or am I in some parallel universe where this kind of mess is acceptable?

It's directed by someone called Chris Tilley (who, judging by this regurgitated dog's breakfast will go on to direct Transformers XI), and stars a Dennis Rodman-a-like, and some random dyke standing in as Bieber. There's lots of CGI. Enjoy.


Professor Locs said...

I just saw the latest Transformers movie and I can attest that Hollywood believes CGI can replace just good old!

Keep writing!

Oura said...

That's the first time I've heard that song... Not really a fan.

In the video I burst out laughing, I thought Chris Brown was about to run away after she got hit by the car! Turns out he was taking a run up, but still the whole mess was hilarious!

Liberator Émigré Éire said...

Oura - It's a great song, completely eclipsed and ruined by this moronic video.

thegayte-keeper said...

Should Chris be smiling in this video? hmmmmm...guess it would make the tween girls n boys wet in that special place.

Prince Toddy English said...

The only song I'm feelin on the album is the one where he samples "Human Nature". It is so obviously a plea to Rihanna to come back.

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