KAOS: Beneath The Skin

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F I L M S K O O L

A F I L M I S A P E T R I F I E D F O U N T A I N O F T H O U G H T

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After his family falls apart Joshua is forced to move to Canada to live with his estranged father. It is there he meets Jay, a local tattoo artist. The two becomes closer despite the negativity that surrounds them.

It's rare to come across a movie with virtually no redeeming features. Even the output of that vainglorious hack Rikki Beadle-Blair can boast of a talented young cast buried somewhere beneath layers of cack.

Look, getting a film made isn't easy; writing a negative review is. But our time is precious, and with so much content out there, and LGBT cinema more accessible than ever thanks to streaming, we need to separate wheat from chaff. If I can save just one person from the excruciating ordeal that is Beneath The Skin, then this (reluctant) hatchet job will have been worth it.

Aaron Ellis wrote, directed and stars in the film, which he claims is inspired by his "teen years as a young gay man". Unfortunately, as well as having the charisma of a limp lettuce leaf, Ellis has the acting ability of a soggy cardboard box. His cast are uniformly awful, and saddled with the burden of having to fake Canadian accents (spoiler: no one succeeds, and the results are catastrophically distracting). Ellis has also roped in porn star Hunter Page, who's the least worst thing about this mess, and whose appeal will likely ensnare more unfortunate viewers than would otherwise have stumbled upon this mess.

The convoluted storyline has more holes in it than a colander, with much of the action stemming from porn scenarios: Ellis' character is beaten up in the street by a homophobe, and is rescued by Page, who invites him home to shower. Everyone needs a shower after a gay-bashing, after all. Page then becomes uncontrollably aroused after glimpsing Ellis in the shower, and has to run off to the bathroom to relieve himself.

That sounds like it might be Another Gay Movie-level fun, but this isn't a comedy: Beneath The Skin takes itself deadly seriously. Everything happens at a snail's pace, and labours under a suffocating, repetitious piano score, before reaching the most unlikely of climaxes you're likely to witness.

Along the way, there are mean girl antics, a bizarre subplot with Wayne Virgo (Shank), and a suburban Berkshire house standing in for Nova Scotia apartment building (access via the kitchen door around the back).

Don't let Beneath The Skin get under your skin: watch something better, like QVC. You'll thank me.

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"A film is a petrified fountain of thought." Jean Cocteau, French filmmaker, 1889-1963

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F I L M S K O O L

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