Death To Fag Ash Lil!

The country is half-flooded, Muslim nutjobs are trying to blow up Piccadilly Circus, Uncle Tony isn't Prime Minister any more, Fergie has a new single out, and Mad May has been carted off to the loony bin in EastEnders. Not a good week then, really.
It isn't all bad news, however, since from Sunday, smoking will be banned, outlawed, prohibited and forbidden, in public places across the country. Smokers are crying foul: their human rights have been eroded! Britain is turning into a nanny state! But their victims - those of us who've been choking on their putrid fumes for years - can rejoice. It's now going to be safe to enjoy a night out in pubs, bars and clubs, without having to endure a sore throat and stinking clothes the morning after - or even the odd burn from a rancid queen waving their fag about.
One tip for non-smokers though - since you won't be able to tell who is and who isn't an ash tray whilst you're within the walls of your favourite club, how can you tell if that boy you've picked up is a DL Fag Ash Lil.

Maybe it's time to bring back branding?

3 comments:

JaredH said...

it's a wonderful thing! we've had smoking bans in pubs and clubs for a bit over a year now, and since then, my enjoyment of and enthusiasm for going to such a place has been increased greatly.

pub and club owners point to the ban as an explanation for a small reduction in profits (of the likes of about 7% average), but none of them were talking about the improved quality in the workplace experienced by their employees... oh, that's right, hospitality workers don't have rights.

our malls are next on the agenda. can't wait!

COOKiE said...

I am quite disappointed with this shit. I'll be back home just in time to to stand outside in the FUCKING London COLD and smoke my cigarette... that's just WRONG!! I say we write a petition!! LOL

James

Ivy Leaguer said...

WHAT?? Mad May's going to the loony bin??? SHUT UP!!!! dammit I hate that i dont see Eastenders the same time you guys do in London!! BOO!!!!

BBC America hasn't been reliable as of late in showing the eps consistently :(

And I miss me some Eastenders....

enjoy your night

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