LENSED

"You don't take a photograph. You ask, quietly, to borrow it..." LENSED: IMAGE IS EVERYTHING

HAVE YOU EVER got caught? You know... looking?

And I don't mean a sly second glance. I mean real, blatant ogling. It happened to me yesterday on an escalator. Look, it's usually the best place for admiring ass: he's in front of you, he's got his back to you, and he ain't turning around.

Escalators only go one way, after all. So, as it happens, I was walking towards the escalator when this incredibly sexy black guy hurries on ahead of me. He gets on, I get on. He's a few steps up of me, fumbling for his Oyster card or whatever, so I lean on the handrail and enjoy the ride, fixing my eyes on the incredibly high, juicy ass sitting atop his big, packed thighs, all poured into tight jeans. This guy was straight, working that whole primary colour popped collar look that says to me, "Jerk". But it's what's in the clothes that interests me on a search and undress mission.

So we reach the top of the escalator, and I tear my eyes away from that bootylicious derriere, looking up, up, up... and my eyes meet his. He is looking back, watching me watch his ass. And he doesn't look happy. Fortunately, the escalator plateaus and he's obviously in a hurry as he steps through the automatic gates. As for me (shamefully) I don't feel the slightest bit of remorse - just "DOH! I got caught!" I mean, really - a seasoned pro like me, getting caught?

That really is shameful.

(Pictures: the photography of Anthony Isambert).